Disagreements with friends are a common topic in IELTS Speaking tests, particularly in Part 2 and Part 3. This subject allows examiners to assess candidates’ ability to articulate personal experiences, express opinions, and discuss interpersonal relationships. Being well-prepared for this topic can significantly boost your chances of achieving a high score in the speaking section.

Describe a time when you disagreed with a friend is a frequent cue card topic that tests your ability to narrate a personal experience while demonstrating your vocabulary and grammatical range. Let’s explore how to tackle this topic effectively across all parts of the IELTS Speaking test.

Part 1: Introduction and Interview

In Part 1, the examiner may ask general questions about friendships and disagreements. Here are some possible questions and sample answers:

1. Do you often disagree with your friends?

   Sample answer (Band 7-8): “While it’s not a frequent occurrence, I do occasionally have disagreements with my friends. I believe it’s a natural part of any relationship, and these differences of opinion often lead to constructive discussions and personal growth.”

2. How do you usually resolve conflicts with friends?

   Sample answer (Band 8-9): “I typically approach conflicts with friends by prioritizing open communication. I make a conscious effort to listen attentively to their perspective and express my viewpoint calmly and rationally. Finding common ground and reaching a mutually acceptable compromise is usually my ultimate goal in resolving disagreements.”

Part 2: Long Turn

Here’s a sample cue card related to the topic:

Describe a time when you disagreed with a friend

You should say:

• Who the friend was
• What you disagreed about
• How you resolved the disagreement
• And explain how you felt about it

Sample answer (Band 8-9):

“I’d like to talk about a significant disagreement I had with my close friend, Sarah, regarding our travel plans for a summer vacation. Sarah and I have been friends since university, and we’ve always enjoyed planning trips together.

The disagreement arose when we were deciding on our destination. I was adamant about visiting Japan, as I’ve always been fascinated by its rich culture and technological advancements. However, Sarah was equally passionate about going to Italy, citing her love for art, history, and cuisine.

Initially, our discussions became quite heated, with both of us staunchly defending our choices. We found ourselves at an impasse, unable to see eye to eye. However, realizing the importance of our friendship, we decided to take a step back and approach the situation more objectively.

We resolved the disagreement by compromising and finding a creative solution. We agreed to plan a longer trip that would include both countries, starting in Japan and ending in Italy. This way, we could fulfill both our travel aspirations without sacrificing our friendship.

Looking back, I feel this disagreement actually strengthened our bond. It taught us valuable lessons about communication, compromise, and respecting each other’s desires. The experience made me appreciate the importance of flexibility in relationships and the joy of finding win-win solutions. Ultimately, it turned out to be one of our most memorable trips, filled with diverse experiences and shared adventures.”

Describe a time when you made a decision that others did not agree with is a related topic that could help you prepare for similar questions about disagreements and decision-making.

Possible follow-up questions:

1. Do you think it’s important to voice your disagreements with friends?

   Sample answer (Band 7-8): “I believe it’s crucial to express disagreements with friends, as long as it’s done respectfully. Open communication helps prevent misunderstandings and allows for personal growth. However, it’s equally important to choose your battles wisely and consider the impact on the friendship.”

2. How has this experience changed your approach to handling disagreements?

   Sample answer (Band 8-9): “This experience has profoundly influenced my approach to handling disagreements. I’ve become more adept at active listening and trying to understand the other person’s perspective before asserting my own. I now view disagreements as opportunities for mutual understanding and growth rather than conflicts to be won.”

Two friends having a serious discussion at an outdoor cafe

Part 3: Two-way Discussion

In Part 3, the examiner will ask more abstract questions related to the topic. Here are some possible questions and sample answers:

1. Why do you think friends sometimes disagree?

   Sample answer (Band 7-8): “Friends often disagree because of differences in perspectives, values, or experiences. Each person has their own unique background and way of thinking, which can lead to varying opinions on different matters. These disagreements, when handled well, can actually strengthen friendships by promoting understanding and respect for diverse viewpoints.”

   Sample answer (Band 8-9): “Disagreements between friends are inevitable and often stem from a myriad of factors. Primarily, I believe they arise due to the inherent diversity in human experiences and thought processes. Each individual’s unique upbringing, cultural background, and personal experiences shape their worldview, leading to differing opinions and priorities. Moreover, as people grow and evolve, their values and beliefs may shift, potentially causing friction with long-standing friendships. These disagreements, while challenging, can serve as catalysts for personal growth and can deepen mutual understanding when approached with empathy and open-mindedness.”

2. Do you think social media has changed the way people handle disagreements with friends?

   Sample answer (Band 7-8): “Social media has definitely impacted how people handle disagreements with friends. On one hand, it provides a platform for open discussions and sharing different perspectives. However, it can also lead to misunderstandings due to the lack of face-to-face communication and the potential for messages to be misinterpreted.”

   Sample answer (Band 8-9): “Social media has undeniably revolutionized the landscape of interpersonal communication, including how people navigate disagreements with friends. It has created a double-edged sword in conflict resolution. On the positive side, it offers instantaneous communication and the ability to share thoughts and feelings in real-time, potentially facilitating quicker resolution of misunderstandings. Additionally, it provides a platform for broader discussions and the opportunity to garner diverse perspectives from a wider network.

   However, the impersonal nature of digital communication can also exacerbate conflicts. The absence of non-verbal cues and tone can lead to misinterpretations, and the public nature of many social media platforms can escalate private disagreements into public spectacles. Furthermore, the ease of expressing opinions without immediate consequences can sometimes lead to hasty, ill-considered responses that can damage friendships.

   Ultimately, while social media has provided new avenues for managing disagreements, it requires a heightened level of emotional intelligence and digital literacy to navigate these platforms effectively in times of conflict.”

Describe a time when you had to handle a conflict at work is another related topic that can help you prepare for questions about disagreements in different contexts.

Key Vocabulary and Phrases for High Scores

1. Adamant (/ˈædəmənt/) – adjective: refusing to change one’s mind
   Example: “I was adamant about my choice of destination.”

2. Impasse (/ˈɪmpæs/) – noun: a situation in which no progress seems possible
   Example: “We reached an impasse in our discussion about the travel plans.”

3. To see eye to eye – idiom: to agree completely
   Example: “We couldn’t see eye to eye on the best destination for our vacation.”

4. To compromise (/ˈkɒmprəmaɪz/) – verb: to reach agreement by mutual concession
   Example: “We decided to compromise by including both destinations in our trip.”

5. To strengthen a bond – phrase: to make a relationship stronger
   Example: “The experience of resolving our disagreement strengthened our bond.”

6. Flexibility (/ˌfleksəˈbɪləti/) – noun: the quality of being able to change or be changed easily according to the situation
   Example: “I learned the importance of flexibility in maintaining friendships.”

Describe a time when you had a disagreement with a coworker can provide additional context for using these vocabulary items in a professional setting.

Examiner’s Advice for High Scores

To achieve a high score in the IELTS Speaking test when discussing disagreements with friends:

1. Use a wide range of vocabulary and complex grammatical structures. Incorporate idiomatic expressions and phrasal verbs naturally in your responses.

2. Provide detailed and well-developed answers. Use specific examples and personal experiences to illustrate your points.

3. Demonstrate critical thinking by analyzing the causes and effects of disagreements, and reflecting on how they impact relationships.

4. Show fluency by speaking at a natural pace with minimal hesitation. Use appropriate linking words to connect your ideas smoothly.

5. Maintain good pronunciation and intonation throughout your responses.

6. Engage with the examiner by making eye contact and showing enthusiasm for the topic.

Remember, practice is key to improving your performance. Regularly rehearse speaking about various topics, including disagreements with friends, to build your confidence and fluency.

Describe a time when you had to stand up for what you believe in is another topic that can help you practice articulating your thoughts on conflicts and personal convictions.

By following these guidelines and incorporating the provided vocabulary and phrases, you’ll be well-equipped to tackle questions about disagreements with friends in your IELTS Speaking test. Good luck with your preparation!