Mastering IELTS Speaking: How to Describe a Family Member You’d Like to Spend More Time With

The IELTS Speaking test often includes questions about family relationships and personal preferences. One common topic that candidates may encounter is describing a family member they would like to spend more time with. This theme allows examiners to assess your ability to express personal opinions, use descriptive language, and discuss relationships. Let’s explore how to approach this topic effectively to achieve a high band score in your IELTS Speaking test.

Part 1: Introduction and Interview

In Part 1, the examiner may ask general questions about your family and relationships. Here are some potential questions and sample answers:

1. Do you have a large family?
2. How often do you see your extended family?
3. Which family member are you closest to?

Let’s focus on the third question:

Sample answer (Band 7-8):

“I’d say I’m closest to my grandmother. We’ve always had a special bond, and I really admire her wisdom and life experiences. She’s been a constant source of support and encouragement throughout my life, and I always look forward to our conversations, whether they’re about everyday things or more profound topics.”

Part 2: Long Turn (Cue Card)

Here’s a potential cue card related to the topic:

Describe A Family Member You Would Like To Spend More Time With.

You should say:
- Who this person is
- What your relationship with them is like
- Why you would like to spend more time with them
- What activities you would like to do together

Sample answer (Band 6-7):

“I’d like to talk about my uncle, who is my father’s younger brother. He’s in his early forties and works as a software engineer in a different city. Our relationship has always been quite good, but due to the distance and our busy schedules, we don’t get to see each other very often.

I really wish I could spend more time with him because he’s not only a fun person to be around but also incredibly knowledgeable about technology and current affairs. Whenever we do meet, our conversations are always engaging and thought-provoking. He has a way of explaining complex topics in a simple and interesting manner, which I find really inspiring.

If we had more time together, I’d love to learn more about his work in the tech industry. Perhaps we could collaborate on a small coding project or attend tech conferences together. Additionally, since he’s an avid traveler, I think it would be great to plan a trip with him. We could explore new places, try local cuisines, and have plenty of time for those deep, meaningful conversations that I always enjoy with him.

Spending more time with my uncle would not only strengthen our bond but also provide me with valuable insights and experiences that could help shape my future career and personal growth.”

Sample answer (Band 8-9):

“I’d like to discuss my maternal grandmother, who’s been a pivotal figure in my life since childhood. She’s in her mid-seventies now, living in a quaint countryside home about a three-hour drive from where I reside. Our relationship has always been characterized by mutual admiration and a deep emotional connection, transcending the typical grandparent-grandchild dynamic.

The primary reason I yearn to spend more time with her stems from her incredible wealth of knowledge and life experiences. Having lived through significant historical events and societal changes, she possesses a unique perspective that I find both enlightening and grounding. Moreover, her unwavering resilience in the face of adversity and her ability to find joy in life’s simple pleasures never cease to inspire me.

If given the opportunity to spend more time together, I’d be particularly keen on documenting her life story. I envision us sitting in her sunlit garden, where I could record her narrating anecdotes from her youth, the challenges she’s overcome, and the wisdom she’s gleaned over the decades. This oral history project would not only be a precious family heirloom but also a profound learning experience for me.

Additionally, I’d love to engage in some of her favorite pastimes with her. For instance, we could spend afternoons tending to her vegetable garden, where she could impart her extensive knowledge of horticulture. Or we could delve into her collection of classic literature, reading aloud to each other and discussing the timeless themes and their relevance to contemporary life.

Ultimately, spending more quality time with my grandmother would allow me to strengthen our bond, gain invaluable insights, and create lasting memories that I’ll cherish for a lifetime. It’s an opportunity not just for personal growth, but also for preserving family heritage and wisdom for future generations.”

Grandmother and granddaughter enjoying quality time

Follow-up questions:

1. How has your relationship with this family member changed over time?
2. What challenges do you face in spending time with this person?

Sample answer for question 1 (Band 8-9):

“My relationship with my grandmother has evolved significantly over the years. As a child, I saw her primarily as a source of affection and treats. However, as I’ve matured, our bond has deepened into a more nuanced and reciprocal connection. Now, I find myself not only seeking her advice but also sharing my own perspectives on life, creating a rich dialogue between generations. This evolution has fostered a mutual respect that goes beyond familial ties, transforming our relationship into a friendship grounded in shared experiences and values.”

Sample answer for question 2 (Band 8-9):

“The main challenge in spending more time with my grandmother is undoubtedly the geographical distance between us. This physical separation is compounded by our respective commitments – my academic pursuits and her community engagements. Additionally, there’s the delicate balance of respecting her need for independence while also ensuring she feels supported. Navigating these challenges requires thoughtful planning and open communication, but the enriching nature of our time together makes overcoming these obstacles entirely worthwhile.”

Part 3: Two-way Discussion

In Part 3, the examiner will ask more abstract questions related to the topic. Here are some potential questions and sample answers:

1. How have family relationships changed in recent years in your country?
2. Do you think people today spend enough time with their families? Why or why not?
3. What role do grandparents play in families in your culture?

Let’s focus on the second question:

Sample answer (Band 7-8):

“In my opinion, many people today don’t spend enough time with their families, and there are several reasons for this. Firstly, the demands of modern work life often leave little time for family interactions. Many individuals work long hours or have multiple jobs to make ends meet, which naturally cuts into family time.

Secondly, the rise of technology and social media has created a paradox where people are more connected than ever digitally, but may be less present in face-to-face family interactions. It’s not uncommon to see family members in the same room, each engrossed in their own devices rather than engaging with one another.

However, I believe there’s a growing awareness of this issue, and many people are making conscious efforts to prioritize family time. This might involve setting aside specific times for family activities, implementing ‘no-phone’ rules during meals, or planning regular family outings or vacations.

Ultimately, the amount of time spent with family varies greatly depending on individual circumstances and cultural norms. While it’s challenging in our fast-paced world, I think it’s crucial for people to recognize the value of family time and make a concerted effort to nurture these relationships.”

Sample answer (Band 8-9):

“The question of whether people today spend enough time with their families is complex and multifaceted, influenced by various societal, economic, and technological factors.

On one hand, the demands of modern life – particularly in urban, developed areas – often create significant time pressures that can detract from family interactions. The prevalence of dual-income households, extended working hours, and long commutes can leave little time for meaningful family engagement. Moreover, the ubiquity of digital devices and social media platforms has introduced a new dimension to this issue, often leading to what sociologists term ‘alone together’ phenomena, where family members may be physically present but mentally absent.

Conversely, there’s a growing body of research highlighting the importance of family time for psychological well-being and social development. This awareness has sparked various initiatives, both at the individual and policy levels, to prioritize family time. For instance, some countries have implemented laws mandating work-life balance, such as limitations on overtime or guaranteed paid family leave.

It’s also worth noting that the concept of ‘enough’ family time is subjective and culturally dependent. What might be considered insufficient in one culture could be seen as adequate or even excessive in another. Additionally, the quality of time spent together often trumps quantity, suggesting that brief but fully engaged interactions can be more valuable than longer periods of distracted coexistence.

In my view, while many people are struggling to balance work, personal pursuits, and family time, there’s an increasing recognition of the need to intentionally carve out and protect family time. This might manifest in various ways, from regular family dinners and weekend activities to annual vacations and holiday traditions.

Ultimately, I believe that rather than asking whether people spend enough time with their families, a more productive approach might be to focus on how individuals and societies can create conditions that foster meaningful family interactions, recognizing that these connections are fundamental to personal happiness and societal well-being.”

Family enjoying quality time together

Key Vocabulary and Phrases for High Scores

To achieve a high band score in the IELTS Speaking test, it’s essential to use a range of sophisticated vocabulary and complex sentence structures. Here are some useful words and phrases related to the topic of family relationships:

1. Nurture /ˈnɜːrtʃər/ (verb): to care for and encourage the growth or development of
   Example: “I believe it’s important to nurture family relationships through regular communication and shared experiences.”

2. Pivotal /ˈpɪvətl/ (adjective): of crucial importance in relation to the development or success of something else
   Example: “My grandmother played a pivotal role in shaping my values and outlook on life.”

3. Reciprocal /rɪˈsɪprəkl/ (adjective): given, felt, or done in return
   Example: “Our relationship has evolved into a reciprocal exchange of ideas and support.”

4. Engrossed /ɪnˈɡrəʊst/ (adjective): having all one’s attention or interest absorbed by someone or something
   Example: “Unfortunately, many family members these days are often engrossed in their smartphones during meal times.”

5. Paradox /ˈpærədɒks/ (noun): a seemingly absurd or contradictory statement or proposition which when investigated may prove to be well founded or true
   Example: “The paradox of modern communication technology is that it can both connect and isolate family members.”

6. Multifaceted /ˌmʌltɪˈfæsɪtɪd/ (adjective): having many different aspects or features
   Example: “The issue of family time in modern society is multifaceted, influenced by work demands, technology, and changing social norms.”

Describe a puzzle you have played can be an interesting topic to discuss in relation to family bonding activities.

Examiner’s Advice

To score high in the IELTS Speaking test when discussing family relationships:

1. Use a variety of descriptive adjectives to talk about family members and relationships.
2. Employ idiomatic expressions and colloquialisms naturally in your responses.
3. Provide specific examples to illustrate your points, drawing from personal experiences.
4. Demonstrate your ability to discuss abstract ideas related to family dynamics and societal changes.
5. Use a range of tenses appropriately to discuss past experiences, current situations, and future aspirations regarding family relationships.
6. Show your ability to analyze and reflect on the topic by discussing both positive and challenging aspects of family relationships.

Remember, practice is key to improving your speaking skills. Try to incorporate these vocabulary items and structures into your everyday English conversations. Describe a personal goal you hope to achieve in the future could be a great topic to practice, as it often relates to personal growth and family support.

IELTS Speaking practice session

By following these guidelines and consistently practicing, you’ll be well-prepared to discuss family relationships and other personal topics in your IELTS Speaking test. Good luck with your preparation!