Mastering IELTS Speaking: How to Confidently Describe an Event Where You Felt Out of Place

The IELTS Speaking test often includes questions about personal experiences, and describing an event where you felt out of place is a common topic. This theme has appeared in past exams and is likely to continue being relevant in future tests. To help you excel in this part of the exam, let’s explore effective strategies and sample answers for discussing such an experience.

Describe a time you felt grateful for someone’s help can be another interesting topic to practice for your IELTS Speaking test. Now, let’s focus on how to describe an event where you felt out of place.

Part 1: Introduction and Interview

In this section, the examiner may ask general questions related to the topic. Here’s an example question with a suggested answer:

Question: Do you often attend social events?

Sample Answer (Band 7-8):
“Well, I’d say I’m fairly social, but I don’t attend events excessively. I usually go to a few gatherings each month, like birthday parties or casual meetups with friends. I find these events enjoyable and a great way to maintain relationships, but I also value my personal time. It’s all about striking a balance between socializing and having time for myself.”

Part 2: Long Turn

Here’s a sample cue card related to the main topic:

Describe an event where you felt out of place

You should say:

• What the event was
• Where and when it took place
• Who was there
• Why you felt out of place

And explain how you handled the situation.

Sample Answer (Band 6-7):

“I’d like to talk about a time when I felt out of place at a formal dinner party. It happened last year at a fancy restaurant in the city center. The event was organized by my company to celebrate a successful project completion.

All the top executives and senior managers were there, dressed in elegant suits and cocktail dresses. As a junior employee, I felt quite nervous and uncomfortable in such a formal setting. I wasn’t used to such high-end dinners and wasn’t sure about the proper etiquette.

I felt out of place because I didn’t know many people there, and the conversations were mostly about topics I wasn’t familiar with. Everyone seemed so confident and at ease, while I was struggling to fit in.

To handle the situation, I tried to stay calm and observe others. I followed their lead when it came to using the right cutlery and engaged in small talk with the person sitting next to me. I also made an effort to listen attentively when others were speaking, even if I couldn’t contribute much to the conversation.

Overall, it was a challenging experience, but I learned a lot about professional networking and formal event etiquette.”

Sample Answer (Band 8-9):

“I’d like to recount an experience where I felt distinctly out of place at a high-profile charity gala. This prestigious event took place at the Grand Ballroom of the Ritz-Carlton hotel in the heart of the city about six months ago.

The gala was attended by a veritable who’s who of local celebrities, business magnates, and political figures. As a young entrepreneur who had recently made a modest donation to the charity, I found myself thrust into this glittering world of high society.

The opulent surroundings and the air of sophistication that permeated the event were quite overwhelming. I felt like a fish out of water amidst the seasoned socialites who navigated the room with effortless grace. My relative inexperience in such rarefied circles was glaringly apparent, and I struggled to find common ground in conversations that ranged from yacht races to art auctions.

To navigate this unfamiliar terrain, I adopted a strategy of active listening and genuine curiosity. I made a concerted effort to engage others by asking thoughtful questions about their philanthropic interests and experiences. This approach not only helped me blend in more seamlessly but also provided valuable insights into the world of charitable giving.

I also seized the opportunity to network strategically, focusing on making meaningful connections rather than trying to impress everyone. By the end of the evening, I had forged a few genuine relationships and gained a deeper appreciation for the complexities of high-society events.

In retrospect, this experience was invaluable in honing my social skills and adaptability. It taught me the importance of maintaining authenticity while also being able to adjust to different social contexts. The initial discomfort ultimately led to personal growth and a broader perspective on social dynamics in professional settings.”

Feeling out of place at a formal event

Follow-up questions:

1. How did this experience change your approach to similar events in the future?

Sample Answer (Band 7-8):
“This experience was definitely eye-opening. It made me realize the importance of preparation for formal events. Now, I make sure to research the dress code and the expected attendees beforehand. I also try to brush up on current events and industry news to feel more confident in conversations. Most importantly, I’ve learned to embrace these situations as opportunities for growth rather than viewing them as uncomfortable ordeals.”

Sample Answer (Band 8-9):
“This experience was truly transformative in shaping my approach to similar events. It catalyzed a significant shift in my mindset, prompting me to view such occasions not as intimidating challenges but as invaluable opportunities for personal and professional development. I’ve since adopted a more proactive stance, diligently researching event contexts, attendee profiles, and relevant topics of discussion. Moreover, I’ve honed my networking skills, learning to initiate and sustain meaningful conversations even in unfamiliar territory. Perhaps most crucially, I’ve cultivated a greater sense of self-assurance, recognizing that my unique perspective can contribute value to any gathering, regardless of its perceived prestige.”

2. Do you think it’s common for people to feel out of place in social situations?

Sample Answer (Band 7-8):
“Yes, I believe it’s quite common for people to feel out of place in social situations, especially in new or unfamiliar environments. It’s a natural human response to feel uncomfortable when we’re not sure about social norms or expectations. This feeling can be particularly strong in professional settings or when meeting new groups of people. However, I think most people get better at handling these situations with experience and by developing their social skills over time.”

Sample Answer (Band 8-9):
“I firmly believe that feeling out of place in social situations is a ubiquitous human experience, transcending cultural and social boundaries. This sensation of social dissonance often stems from our innate desire for belonging and acceptance, juxtaposed against the uncertainty of navigating unfamiliar social terrains. In our increasingly interconnected world, where individuals frequently find themselves in diverse and novel social contexts, this feeling has perhaps become even more prevalent.

However, it’s crucial to recognize that this discomfort can serve as a catalyst for personal growth. It challenges us to expand our comfort zones, develop greater empathy, and hone our adaptive skills. Moreover, the universality of this experience can, paradoxically, be a unifying factor, fostering a sense of shared human vulnerability that, when acknowledged, can lead to more authentic and meaningful social interactions.”

Part 3: Two-way Discussion

In this section, the examiner will ask more abstract questions related to the topic. Here’s an example:

Question: Why do you think some people adapt more easily to new social situations than others?

Sample Answer (Band 7-8):
“I think there are several reasons why some people adapt more easily to new social situations. Firstly, personality traits play a big role. Extroverted individuals often find it easier to strike up conversations and make new connections. Secondly, past experiences can make a difference. People who have been exposed to various social settings from a young age may feel more comfortable in new situations. Lastly, self-confidence is crucial. Those who are secure in themselves tend to worry less about others’ judgments and can relax more easily in unfamiliar environments.”

Sample Answer (Band 8-9):
“The ease with which individuals adapt to new social situations is, in my opinion, a complex interplay of various factors. Inherent personality traits, such as extroversion or openness to experience, undoubtedly play a significant role. These characteristics can predispose individuals to approach novel social contexts with curiosity and enthusiasm rather than trepidation.

However, I believe that learned skills and experiences are equally, if not more, influential. Early exposure to diverse social environments can foster adaptability and cultural intelligence, enabling individuals to navigate unfamiliar social terrains with greater ease. Moreover, the development of emotional intelligence – the ability to read social cues, empathize with others, and regulate one’s own emotions – is crucial in facilitating smooth social interactions across various contexts.

Another critical factor is an individual’s mindset. Those who view new social situations as opportunities for growth and learning, rather than potential threats, are likely to adapt more readily. This growth mindset can be cultivated over time through conscious effort and positive reinforcement.

Lastly, I would argue that societal and cultural factors play a significant role. Societies that value and encourage social flexibility and intercultural competence may produce individuals who are more adept at adapting to new social situations. Conversely, more rigid or homogeneous social structures might limit the development of these adaptive skills.

In essence, while some individuals may seem naturally more adept at social adaptation, I believe this ability is largely a cultivated skill set, shaped by a combination of personal experiences, learned strategies, and broader societal influences.”

Describe a time you worked under pressure is another challenging topic that can help you prepare for various scenarios in the IELTS Speaking test.

Key Vocabulary and Phrases for High Scores

To enhance your speaking performance, incorporate these advanced vocabulary items and phrases:

1. Veritable who’s who /ˈverɪtəbəl huːz huː/ (phrase): A group of the most notable or important people in a particular field.
   Example: “The event was attended by a veritable who’s who of the tech industry.”

2. Thrust into /θrʌst ˈɪntuː/ (phrasal verb): To be suddenly put into a new situation or role.
   Example: “As a new employee, I was thrust into a leadership position unexpectedly.”

3. Opulent /ˈɒpjʊlənt/ (adjective): Luxurious or lavish.
   Example: “The opulent decorations at the gala were truly breathtaking.”

4. Rarefied /ˈreərɪfaɪd/ (adjective): Exclusive or refined, especially because of distance from ordinary people.
   Example: “I felt out of place in the rarefied atmosphere of the executive boardroom.”

5. Forge /fɔːdʒ/ (verb): To form or create, especially with effort.
   Example: “Despite feeling uncomfortable, I managed to forge some valuable connections at the event.”

Tips from an IELTS Speaking Examiner

To excel in the IELTS Speaking test, particularly when describing events where you felt out of place:

1. Practice storytelling: Develop your ability to narrate experiences coherently and engagingly.

2. Expand your vocabulary: Learn and use a variety of descriptive words and idiomatic expressions related to social situations and emotions.

3. Work on fluency: Practice speaking without long pauses. It’s okay to use fillers like “well” or “you know” occasionally, but don’t overuse them.

4. Develop your ideas: Don’t just give short answers. Expand on your points and provide examples or explanations.

5. Use a range of grammatical structures: Incorporate complex sentences and different tenses to demonstrate your language proficiency.

6. Be authentic: While it’s good to prepare, make sure your responses sound natural and personal.

7. Stay calm: Remember that feeling nervous is normal. Take deep breaths and try to relax during the test.

By following these strategies and incorporating advanced vocabulary, you’ll be well-prepared to discuss experiences of feeling out of place in your IELTS Speaking test. Remember, the key is to practice regularly and stay confident in your abilities.

Describe a time when you lost something can be another interesting topic to practice, helping you further diversify your speaking skills for the IELTS test.