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IELTS Writing Task 2: Mastering Essays on Promoting Circular Economy in Industries (Band 7-9 Samples)

Circular Economy in Industry

Circular Economy in Industry

The topic of promoting a circular economy in industries has become increasingly prevalent in IELTS Writing Task 2 exams. Based on recent trends and the growing importance of sustainability, it’s likely that this theme will continue to appear frequently in future tests. Let’s explore a real IELTS question on this subject and analyze sample essays for different band scores.

Circular Economy in Industry

Analyzing the Question

Some people say that the best way to improve environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

This question indirectly relates to promoting a circular economy in industries by addressing environmental issues and resource consumption. Let’s break it down:

  1. Topic: Environmental problems and fuel costs
  2. Task: Agree or disagree
  3. Key points to consider:
    • Environmental impact of vehicle fuel consumption
    • Effectiveness of increasing fuel costs as a solution
    • Alternative methods to promote sustainability
    • Potential consequences of higher fuel prices

Sample Essay 1: Band 8-9

Environmental concerns have become increasingly pressing in recent years, with many experts proposing various solutions to mitigate the damage caused by human activities. One such suggestion is to raise the cost of fuel for vehicles as a means of addressing environmental issues. While this approach may have some merits, I believe it is not the most effective solution and disagree that it should be the primary method employed.

Undoubtedly, increasing fuel prices could lead to reduced vehicle usage and, consequently, lower emissions. Higher costs would incentivize people to seek alternative transportation methods, such as public transit, cycling, or walking, which are more environmentally friendly. Additionally, it might encourage automotive manufacturers to invest more heavily in developing fuel-efficient or electric vehicles, further reducing the carbon footprint of the transportation sector.

However, this approach has several significant drawbacks. Firstly, it disproportionately affects lower-income individuals who may not have the means to upgrade to more efficient vehicles or access to reliable public transportation. This could exacerbate social inequalities and potentially lead to economic hardships for many families. Moreover, increased fuel costs would likely result in higher prices for goods and services, as transportation costs are often passed on to consumers.

Instead of relying solely on fuel price hikes, a more comprehensive and equitable approach to environmental problems is necessary. Governments should focus on promoting a circular economy across all industries, not just transportation. This could include initiatives such as:

  1. Investing in renewable energy sources and improving energy efficiency in manufacturing processes.
  2. Implementing stricter regulations on industrial emissions and waste management.
  3. Providing incentives for companies that adopt sustainable practices and develop eco-friendly technologies.
  4. Improving public transportation infrastructure and encouraging its use through subsidies and awareness campaigns.
  5. Educating the public about environmental issues and promoting individual responsibility in resource consumption.

By addressing environmental concerns through a multi-faceted approach, we can create more sustainable industries and lifestyles without placing an undue burden on specific segments of society. This holistic strategy would not only tackle the issues related to vehicle emissions but also promote a broader shift towards a circular economy that minimizes waste and maximizes resource efficiency across all sectors.

In conclusion, while increasing fuel costs may have some positive environmental impacts, it is not the best solution to our environmental problems. A more comprehensive approach that promotes a circular economy across all industries, combined with education and incentives for sustainable practices, would be far more effective in addressing environmental issues without creating additional social and economic challenges.

Analysis of Band 8-9 Essay

This essay demonstrates excellent qualities that justify a high band score:

  1. Task Response: The essay clearly addresses the question, presenting a well-developed argument against relying solely on increased fuel costs to solve environmental problems.

  2. Coherence and Cohesion: The essay is logically structured with clear paragraphing. Ideas flow smoothly with appropriate use of linking words and phrases.

  3. Lexical Resource: The vocabulary is sophisticated and precise, with a wide range of words and phrases used accurately (e.g., “mitigate,” “incentivize,” “disproportionately affects,” “exacerbate”).

  4. Grammatical Range and Accuracy: The essay showcases a variety of complex sentence structures with minimal errors, demonstrating a high level of grammatical control.

  5. Development of Ideas: Each point is well-elaborated with relevant examples and explanations, showing depth of critical thinking.

Sample Essay 2: Band 6-7

Environmental problems are a major concern in today’s world, and many solutions have been proposed to address them. Some people believe that increasing the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles is the best way to improve these issues. While this approach may have some benefits, I partially disagree with this statement.

Raising fuel prices could help reduce vehicle usage and lower emissions. When fuel becomes more expensive, people might choose to drive less or switch to more fuel-efficient vehicles. This could lead to a decrease in air pollution and greenhouse gas emissions, which are major contributors to environmental problems.

However, there are some drawbacks to this approach. Firstly, it may unfairly affect people with lower incomes who rely on their vehicles for work or daily activities. They might not be able to afford the higher fuel costs or buy new, more efficient cars. Additionally, increasing fuel prices could lead to higher costs for goods and services, as transportation expenses would rise.

Instead of only focusing on fuel prices, I believe a more balanced approach is needed to address environmental problems. This could include:

  1. Improving public transportation systems to provide alternatives to private vehicles.
  2. Investing in renewable energy sources to reduce reliance on fossil fuels.
  3. Encouraging companies to adopt more sustainable practices in their operations.
  4. Educating people about the importance of environmental conservation and how they can contribute.

By implementing a combination of these strategies, we can work towards a more sustainable future without placing too much burden on any one group of people.

In conclusion, while increasing fuel costs may have some positive effects on the environment, it is not the only or best solution to our environmental problems. A more comprehensive approach that includes various measures to promote sustainability and reduce environmental impact would be more effective and fair.

Analysis of Band 6-7 Essay

This essay demonstrates good qualities that justify a band score of 6-7:

  1. Task Response: The essay addresses the question and presents a clear position, though the argument could be more fully developed.

  2. Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a clear structure with appropriate paragraphing. There is some use of cohesive devices, but it could be more sophisticated.

  3. Lexical Resource: The vocabulary is generally appropriate, with some attempts at using less common words. However, the range could be wider, and there’s room for more precise word choice.

  4. Grammatical Range and Accuracy: The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentences with generally good control. There are no major errors that impede understanding.

  5. Development of Ideas: Ideas are relevant and supported, but could be elaborated on further with more specific examples or deeper analysis.

Key Vocabulary to Remember

  1. Circular economy (noun) /ˌsɜːkjələr iˈkɒnəmi/: An economic system aimed at eliminating waste and the continual use of resources.

  2. Sustainability (noun) /səˌsteɪnəˈbɪləti/: The ability to maintain or support a process continuously over time.

  3. Incentivize (verb) /ɪnˈsentɪvaɪz/: To motivate or encourage someone to do something.

  4. Disproportionately (adverb) /ˌdɪsprəˈpɔːʃənətli/: To an extent that is too large or too small in comparison with something else.

  5. Exacerbate (verb) /ɪɡˈzæsəbeɪt/: To make a problem, bad situation, or negative feeling worse.

  6. Infrastructure (noun) /ˈɪnfrəstrʌktʃə(r)/: The basic physical and organizational structures and facilities needed for the operation of a society or enterprise.

  7. Holistic (adjective) /həˈlɪstɪk/: Characterized by the belief that the parts of something are interconnected and can be explained only by reference to the whole.

  8. Mitigate (verb) /ˈmɪtɪɡeɪt/: To make something less severe, serious, or painful.

  9. Emissions (noun) /ɪˈmɪʃn/: The production and discharge of something, especially gas or radiation.

  10. Renewable (adjective) /rɪˈnjuːəbl/: (of a natural resource or source of energy) not depleted when used.

Conclusion

The topic of promoting a circular economy in industries is likely to remain relevant in future IELTS Writing Task 2 exams. As you’ve seen from the sample essays, this theme can be approached from various angles, such as environmental protection, sustainable resource management, and economic policies.

To prepare for similar topics, consider practicing with these potential questions:

  1. How can governments encourage businesses to adopt more sustainable practices?
  2. What role should consumers play in promoting a circular economy?
  3. Do you think international cooperation is necessary to address global environmental issues? Why or why not?

Remember to structure your essays clearly, use a range of vocabulary and grammatical structures, and support your arguments with relevant examples. Feel free to practice writing an essay on one of these topics and share it in the comments section for feedback and discussion. This active practice will help you improve your IELTS Writing skills and prepare you for success in the exam.

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