IELTS Writing Task 2 Example IELTS Writing Task 2 Example

Is “It Proves That” Holding You Back in IELTS Writing?

“It proves that…” seems like a simple phrase, right? However, using it effectively and appropriately in your IELTS writing can be trickier than you think. While it might be suitable for casual conversation, in academic writing, it often comes across as lacking nuance and sophistication.

Let’s look at some examples:

Example 1:

  • Basic: The increasing number of cars on the road proves that pollution levels are rising.
  • Improved: The increasing number of cars on the road strongly suggests a correlation with rising pollution levels.

Example 2:

  • Basic: The success of social media campaigns proves that young people are engaged in environmental issues.
  • Improved: The success of social media campaigns illustrates the significant level of engagement young people have with environmental issues.

Example 3:

  • Basic: The declining birth rate proves that people are concerned about overpopulation.
  • Improved: The declining birth rate could be indicative of growing concerns about overpopulation and its associated challenges.

As you can see from the examples, simply stating “it proves that” often presents an overly simplified view of complex issues.

Understanding the Nuances of “It Proves That”

In academic writing, particularly for the IELTS exam, it’s crucial to present a balanced and well-supported argument. The phrase “it proves that” can sound too definitive, implying absolute certainty where caution is needed.

Let’s delve into the common mistakes surrounding the use of “it proves that” and explore how to avoid them:

Alternatives to “It Proves That”

Here’s a breakdown of alternatives that can elevate your writing:

Expressing Evidence and Support:

  • To indicate strong evidence:
    • This strongly suggests that…
    • The data clearly demonstrates that…
    • This provides compelling evidence that…
  • To suggest a correlation:
    • This implies a link between…
    • There appears to be a correlation between…
    • This suggests a possible relationship between…

Presenting a Balanced Perspective:

  • To acknowledge alternative viewpoints:
    • While this suggests…, it’s important to consider…
    • Although the evidence indicates…, other factors may also play a role.
    • This perspective should be balanced against…
  • To avoid overgeneralization:
    • This suggests a trend, but further research is needed to confirm…
    • This example illustrates a potential outcome, but…
    • While this holds true in some cases, it’s not universally applicable.

IELTS Writing Task 2 ExampleIELTS Writing Task 2 Example

Example in an IELTS Writing Task 2 Essay:

Topic: Some people believe that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, believe that there are other measures that would be more effective. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Body Paragraph with “it proves that”:

Building more sports facilities proves that people will become more active. When there are readily available places to play sports, it’s easier for people to engage in physical activity.

Improved Body Paragraph:

Increasing the availability of sports facilities can certainly contribute to a more active population. When individuals have convenient access to well-maintained gyms, swimming pools, and playing fields, they are more likely to incorporate physical activity into their routines.

Analysis: The improved version moves away from the definitive “proves” and instead uses language that acknowledges the complexity of the issue while still presenting a clear and reasoned argument.

Common Mistakes and How to Avoid Them

  • Overusing “it proves that”: Vary your language to maintain reader interest and demonstrate a wider vocabulary.
  • Making sweeping generalizations: Qualify your statements and avoid absolute claims.
  • Ignoring alternative perspectives: Acknowledge opposing viewpoints to create a more balanced argument.

Conclusion

By being mindful of the language you use, particularly in academic writing for the IELTS, you can present a more nuanced, balanced, and ultimately more convincing argument. Avoiding the overuse of “it proves that” and opting for more sophisticated alternatives will undoubtedly strengthen your writing and help you achieve a higher band score. Remember, effective communication is not just about what you say, but also how you say it.

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