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IELTS Writing Task 2: Sample Essays on Why Governments Should Prioritize Mental Health (Band 6-9)

Mental health awareness campaign

Mental health awareness campaign

Mental health has become an increasingly important topic in recent years, and it’s no surprise that it has also found its way into IELTS Writing Task 2 questions. Based on recent trends and the growing global awareness of mental health issues, we can expect to see more questions related to this topic in future IELTS exams. Let’s explore a relevant question and analyze sample essays at different band levels.

Some people believe that governments should invest more in mental health services. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Analyzing the Question

This question asks for your opinion on whether governments should allocate more resources to mental health services. It’s important to note that this is an agree/disagree question, so you need to clearly state your position and support it with relevant arguments and examples.

Key points to consider:

Now, let’s look at sample essays for different band scores.

Sample Essay 1 (Band 8-9)

Mental health is a crucial aspect of overall well-being that has long been overlooked in many healthcare systems. I strongly agree that governments should invest more in mental health services, as this investment can lead to significant improvements in public health, economic productivity, and social cohesion.

Firstly, increased government funding for mental health services can greatly improve access to care for those in need. Many individuals with mental health issues struggle to find affordable and timely treatment, often leading to worsening conditions and increased societal costs in the long run. By allocating more resources to mental health services, governments can ensure that a wider range of treatments and support systems are available to all citizens, regardless of their socioeconomic status. This improved access can lead to earlier interventions and better overall health outcomes for the population.

Moreover, prioritizing mental health can have substantial economic benefits. Mental health issues are a leading cause of lost productivity in the workplace, with conditions such as depression and anxiety contributing to absenteeism and reduced performance. By investing in mental health services, governments can help create a healthier, more productive workforce, ultimately boosting economic growth and reducing the financial burden on healthcare and social welfare systems.

Additionally, robust mental health services can play a crucial role in addressing broader societal issues. For instance, proper mental health support can aid in reducing crime rates, as many offenders struggle with untreated mental health conditions. It can also contribute to stronger family units and communities by providing individuals with the tools to manage stress, resolve conflicts, and maintain healthy relationships.

Some may argue that increased spending on mental health services could strain government budgets or divert resources from other important areas. However, the long-term benefits of improved mental health outcomes far outweigh the initial costs. Prevention and early intervention in mental health issues can significantly reduce the need for more expensive treatments and social support in the future.

In conclusion, government investment in mental health services is not only a moral imperative but also a sound economic and social strategy. By prioritizing mental health, governments can create healthier, more productive societies and address a wide range of interconnected issues. The potential benefits of such investment make it a crucial area for increased attention and resources.

(Word count: 368)

Essay Analysis (Band 8-9)

This essay demonstrates excellent characteristics of a high-scoring IELTS Writing Task 2 response:

  1. Clear position: The writer clearly agrees with the statement in the introduction.
  2. Well-developed arguments: Each paragraph presents a distinct point supported by explanations and examples.
  3. Coherence and cohesion: Ideas flow logically, with effective use of linking words and phrases.
  4. Lexical resource: The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary accurately and appropriately.
  5. Grammatical range and accuracy: It demonstrates a variety of complex structures with minimal errors.
  6. Task response: The essay fully addresses all parts of the task, providing a well-balanced and thorough response.

Sample Essay 2 (Band 6-7)

In recent years, mental health has become a big issue in many countries. I agree that governments should spend more money on mental health services because it can help many people and improve society.

One reason why governments should invest in mental health is that it can help people who are suffering. Many people have mental health problems but can’t get help because it’s too expensive or there aren’t enough doctors. If the government puts more money into these services, more people can get the help they need. This can make their lives better and stop their problems from getting worse.

Another important point is that better mental health can be good for the economy. When people have mental health issues, they might not be able to work well or might miss work often. This can cost companies a lot of money. If the government helps people with their mental health, more people can work better and this can help the country’s economy grow.

Also, good mental health services can help make society safer. Sometimes, people with untreated mental health problems might do dangerous things. If they can get help early, it might prevent some crimes and make communities safer for everyone.

Some people might say that spending more on mental health means less money for other important things like education or roads. But I think that if we help people with their mental health, it can save money in the long run because we won’t need to spend as much on hospitals or prisons.

In conclusion, I believe that governments should definitely invest more in mental health services. It can help individuals, improve the economy, and make society better for everyone. The benefits of spending money on mental health are worth it in the end.

(Word count: 295)

Essay Analysis (Band 6-7)

This essay demonstrates good characteristics of a mid-range IELTS Writing Task 2 response:

  1. Clear position: The writer’s opinion is stated clearly in the introduction.
  2. Relevant ideas: The essay presents relevant points to support the argument.
  3. Basic organization: There is a clear structure with introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
  4. Adequate vocabulary: The essay uses some topic-specific vocabulary, though not as sophisticated as the Band 8-9 essay.
  5. Grammar: It uses a mix of simple and complex sentences, with some errors that do not impede understanding.
  6. Task response: The essay addresses the main parts of the task, though not as thoroughly as the higher band essay.

Sample Essay 3 (Band 5-6)

Mental health is very important for people. I think governments should give more money to mental health services. It can help many people who have problems with their mind.

First, many people need help with mental health. If government give more money, more doctors can help people. This is good because people can feel better and be happy. When people are happy, they can do more things in life.

Also, mental health is important for work. If people have good mental health, they can work better. This is good for companies and for the country. More work means more money for everyone.

Sometimes people with mental health problems can do bad things. If they get help, maybe they won’t do bad things. This makes the place we live safer for everyone.

Some people think spending money on mental health is not good. They think we should use money for other things. But I think helping people with mental health is very important.

In conclusion, I agree that governments should spend more money on mental health services. It helps people, makes work better, and makes places safer. Mental health is important for everyone.

(Word count: 174)

Essay Analysis (Band 5-6)

This essay demonstrates characteristics of a lower mid-range IELTS Writing Task 2 response:

  1. Position stated: The writer’s opinion is clear, though simply expressed.
  2. Basic ideas: The essay presents some relevant points, but they lack depth and development.
  3. Simple organization: There is a basic structure, but paragraphs are short and underdeveloped.
  4. Limited vocabulary: The essay uses simple vocabulary, with some repetition.
  5. Grammar: It primarily uses simple sentences with some errors that occasionally impede understanding.
  6. Task response: The essay addresses the task, but in a limited and superficial manner.

Key Vocabulary to Remember

  1. Mental health (noun) – /ˈmen.təl helθ/ – A person’s condition with regard to their psychological and emotional well-being.

  2. Prioritize (verb) – /praɪˈɒr.ə.taɪz/ – To give more importance to something compared to other things.

  3. Intervention (noun) – /ˌɪn.təˈven.ʃən/ – The action of becoming involved in a difficult situation in order to improve it or prevent it from getting worse.

  4. Stigma (noun) – /ˈstɪɡ.mə/ – A strong feeling of disapproval that most people in a society have about something, especially when this is unfair.

  5. Productivity (noun) – /ˌprɒd.ʌkˈtɪv.ə.ti/ – The rate at which a worker, a company or a country produces goods, and the amount produced, compared with how much time, work and money is needed to produce them.

  6. Allocation (noun) – /ˌæl.əˈkeɪ.ʃən/ – The act of giving a particular amount of something, especially money, to a particular person or for a particular purpose.

  7. Preventive (adjective) – /prɪˈven.tɪv/ – Designed to stop something bad from happening.

  8. Holistic (adjective) – /həʊˈlɪs.tɪk/ – Dealing with or treating the whole of something or someone and not just a part.

  9. Resilience (noun) – /rɪˈzɪl.i.əns/ – The ability to be happy, successful, etc. again after something difficult or bad has happened.

  10. Awareness (noun) – /əˈweə.nəs/ – Knowledge that something exists, or understanding of a situation or subject at the present time based on information or experience.

Mental health awareness campaign

Conclusion

The topic of mental health and government investment in related services is likely to remain relevant in IELTS Writing Task 2. As you prepare for your exam, consider practicing with similar questions, such as:

Remember to structure your essay clearly, use a range of vocabulary and grammatical structures, and support your arguments with relevant examples. Feel free to practice writing an essay on this topic and share it in the comments section for feedback and discussion. This active practice can significantly improve your writing skills for the IELTS exam.

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