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IELTS Writing Task 2: Sample Essays on Managing Urbanization to Prevent Social Exclusion (Band 6-9)

Urban planning and development

Urban planning and development

Urbanization and its social impacts have become increasingly prevalent topics in IELTS Writing Task 2. Based on recent trends, questions related to “why urbanization should be managed to prevent social exclusion” are likely to appear more frequently in future IELTS exams. This article will provide sample essays at different band levels to help you prepare for this important topic.

Let’s examine a relevant question that has appeared in recent IELTS exams:

Some people think that governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems in cities. Others believe that other problems in cities are more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Analyzing the Question

This question relates directly to urbanization and its challenges. It requires candidates to:

  1. Discuss the view that governments should prioritize environmental pollution and housing issues in cities
  2. Discuss the view that other urban problems are more important
  3. Provide and justify their own opinion

Now, let’s look at sample essays for different band scores, along with analysis and explanations.

Sample Essay 1 (Band 8-9)

Urban areas worldwide face numerous challenges, and there is ongoing debate about which issues should take precedence. While some argue that governments should concentrate on mitigating environmental pollution and addressing housing shortages, others contend that different urban problems deserve more attention. In my opinion, a holistic approach that addresses multiple urban issues simultaneously is essential for creating sustainable and inclusive cities.

Those who prioritize environmental pollution and housing problems have valid concerns. Urban air pollution poses severe health risks to city dwellers, contributing to respiratory diseases and reduced life expectancy. Similarly, the lack of affordable housing in many cities leads to overcrowding, homelessness, and social inequality. By focusing on these issues, governments can significantly improve the quality of life for urban residents and create more livable cities.

However, proponents of addressing other urban problems argue that issues such as inadequate public transportation, unemployment, and crime are equally pressing. Inefficient public transport systems contribute to traffic congestion and hinder economic productivity. High unemployment rates in cities can lead to social unrest and increased poverty. Moreover, rising crime rates in urban areas threaten public safety and social cohesion. These problems, if left unaddressed, can undermine the overall well-being of urban populations.

In my view, a comprehensive approach to urban development is crucial. While environmental pollution and housing are indeed critical issues, they are interconnected with other urban challenges. For instance, improving public transportation can reduce air pollution, while creating job opportunities can help people afford better housing. Therefore, governments should adopt integrated strategies that tackle multiple urban problems concurrently, ensuring a balanced and sustainable urban development.

In conclusion, while environmental pollution and housing issues are undoubtedly important, other urban problems should not be neglected. A holistic approach that addresses various urban challenges simultaneously is the most effective way to create livable, sustainable, and inclusive cities for all residents.

(309 words)

Urban planning and development

Analysis of Band 8-9 Essay

This essay demonstrates excellent features that warrant a high band score:

  1. Task Achievement: The essay fully addresses all parts of the task, discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion.

  2. Coherence and Cohesion: The essay is well-organized with clear paragraphing and effective use of cohesive devices (“While”, “However”, “For instance”).

  3. Lexical Resource: The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary accurately and appropriately (“mitigating”, “precedence”, “holistic approach”, “sustainable and inclusive cities”).

  4. Grammatical Range and Accuracy: The essay demonstrates a wide range of grammatical structures used accurately and flexibly (“While some argue that…, others contend that…”, “By focusing on these issues, governments can…”).

  5. Development of Ideas: Each main point is well-developed with relevant examples and explanations.

Sample Essay 2 (Band 6-7)

Many people have different opinions about what problems governments should focus on in cities. Some think that environmental pollution and housing issues are the most important, while others believe there are more serious problems. I will discuss both views and give my opinion.

On one hand, environmental pollution and housing problems are big issues in many cities. Air pollution from cars and factories can make people sick, and it’s hard to find affordable places to live in big cities. If the government works on these problems, it can make cities healthier and more comfortable for people to live in.

On the other hand, some people think other problems in cities are more important. For example, public transportation is often not good enough, and there aren’t enough jobs for everyone. Also, crime is a big problem in some cities. These issues can make life difficult for people living in cities too.

In my opinion, I think all of these problems are important and connected to each other. For example, if there is better public transportation, it can help reduce pollution. And if there are more jobs, people can afford better housing. So, I believe the government should try to solve all these problems together, not just focus on one or two.

To conclude, while pollution and housing are big issues, other urban problems are also important. I think the best way is for governments to work on all these problems at the same time to make cities better places to live.

(246 words)

Analysis of Band 6-7 Essay

This essay demonstrates features that place it in the Band 6-7 range:

  1. Task Achievement: The essay addresses all parts of the task, but the ideas are less fully developed compared to the Band 8-9 essay.

  2. Coherence and Cohesion: The essay is generally well-organized, but the use of cohesive devices is less sophisticated (“On one hand”, “On the other hand”, “For example”).

  3. Lexical Resource: The vocabulary is adequate but less varied and precise compared to the higher band essay (“big issues”, “make cities better”).

  4. Grammatical Range and Accuracy: The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentences, but with less variety and sophistication than the Band 8-9 essay.

  5. Development of Ideas: Main points are supported, but the examples and explanations are less detailed and nuanced.

Key Vocabulary to Remember

  1. Urbanization (noun) /ˌɜːrbənaɪˈzeɪʃn/ – the process of more people living in cities
  2. Social exclusion (noun phrase) /ˈsəʊʃl ɪkˈskluːʒn/ – when people are shut out of society
  3. Holistic (adjective) /həˈlɪstɪk/ – considering the whole thing or being, not just parts
  4. Mitigate (verb) /ˈmɪtɪɡeɪt/ – to make less severe or serious
  5. Sustainable (adjective) /səˈsteɪnəbl/ – able to continue over a period of time
  6. Inclusive (adjective) /ɪnˈkluːsɪv/ – including many different types of people
  7. Livable (adjective) /ˈlɪvəbl/ – suitable or good enough to live in
  8. Interconnected (adjective) /ˌɪntəkəˈnektɪd/ – having different parts or elements connected or related
  9. Concurrent (adjective) /kənˈkʌrənt/ – existing or happening at the same time
  10. Integrated (adjective) /ˈɪntɪɡreɪtɪd/ – combining two or more things to make something more effective

Conclusion

Understanding how to address topics related to urbanization and social exclusion is crucial for success in IELTS Writing Task 2. By studying these sample essays and analyzing their strengths, you can improve your own writing skills and achieve a higher band score.

To practice, try writing your own essay on the given topic and share it in the comments section below. This active practice will help you internalize the structures and vocabulary needed to excel in your IELTS Writing Task 2.

Remember, future IELTS topics may include variations on this theme, such as:

By preparing for these potential topics, you’ll be well-equipped to handle a wide range of urbanization-related questions in your IELTS exam.

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